By Brandon Kirk
[This is part two of an ongoing narrative based around a single playthrough I did of the Indie game FTL. It's highly abstracted and fictionalized, but it's entirely based on in-game events and situations. It's a fun game. You should play it.]
Dear Diary...
A while ago, I received this weird letter in the mail. It was from a company called "Univox Corporation," and it seemed to be hand typed. I had no idea what to make of it, but I just came across it in one of my desk drawers, and I thought I would post it here to share in the...
I’ve been working on this book for quite a while now, and I’m still very excited about how great it is. However, I’m still waiting on some offers from some movie studios for the film rights. Just let me know when you’re ready to make some fat stacks, movie studios.
Anyway...
I've been pleased as punch with the response to the first excerpt from my new novel, District Alpha: Government Mandate Zone. I was so encouraged by all the positive feedback, in fact, that I have decided to release the next chapter for your consideration! Even though everybody seems to love it, for some reason I still haven't been sent an offer for the movie rights. Reminder: the movie rights are still available!...
Apparently the thing to do these days is write a catchy pseudo-sci-fi dystopian future novel and then have that novel adapted into a movie. I’ve therefore started working on a new novel, which is entitled District Alpha: Government Mandate Zone. It’s about a young girl...
My parents live in the middle of nowhere. They like it because it's nice and remote, and they get to see plenty of wildlife. My parents love wildlife. They love the deer, the birds, and the turtles. They love everything . . . except the snakes. It turns out my Mom hates...
My parents have been doing some research into my family's history, recently. They uncovered some interesting things, as well as a genealogical line stretching all the way back to when people had names like GRONGNARD. One of the more interesting things they found, though...
I have been working for the Engineering Computer Network for several months now. That job is another story. However, the name adventure that I had at my job is not another story. I worked there for about a month. Everything was going perf
...or Every Abortion of Critical Thinking has Consequences
Read part one
"Do you want to go to this Halloween party?" Andrew asked me on Saturday evening.
"That's the first time someone has asked me to go to a Halloween party," I repl
...or, Why you should live on the first floor.
Read part one
"Do you want to help me unload an organ from my car?" Andrew Monkey said to me at about 11 Saturday morning.
"That's the second time someone has asked me to unload an organ today." I respon
...or, Shauvon and Andrew get taken by an old crippled lady.
"Do you want to go to Goodwill?" Andrew Monkey said.
"That's the second time someone has asked me that today." I responded. "And the first time I will say 'yes.'"
Off we went, to the
...In which Shauvon is accepted to college, and visits a pulmonologist.
In 2004, I was accepted to Purdue University. It was a pretty exciting moment in my life. Well, not that exciting, I suppose, considering they accept somewhere around 50,000 new students ever...
I'm a man of many names. Well, perhaps I'm not a man, but I do have many names. I will recount my misnamed misadventures here, so that everyone can find entertainment in other people's confusion.
Part I, In which Shauvon glazes over twelve whole years of
...